Mentor: Move over and make room to sustain our future
Posted on August. 6. 2023
By Stepan Piligian | The Armenian Weekly
Armenians in the diaspora are sustained by a generational transfer of identity. The identity of each succeeding generation hopefully retains a core but creates its own nuances. These changes are called adaptation. The challenge is to blend enough into the host environment without losing the core elements of an ethnic identity, as each generation builds its own definition of identity. Some core elements include the role of native language in the home, intermarriage and the presence of an independent homeland. Each variable in the life of a diaspora Armenian can be both a challenge and a blessing.
I know many American-born Armenians of my generation who lost their fluency in the Armenian language but not their identity, including our heritage and faith. The latter served as a motivator to reconnect with the language in their adult life. We have also learned that the “percentage” of Armenian DNA is not an obstacle to identity. Being raised by two dedicated Armenian parents has a certain probability of success, but the diaspora is full of examples of latent identity. There are also many “100-percent” Armenians who do nothing with this inheritance and simply drift into assimilation. In contrast, particularly since the independence of 1991, we have remarkable examples of individuals with minimal Armenian exposure discovering a productive and satisfying identity with their Armenian heritage. The Republics of Armenia and Artsakh, along with the outstanding diaspora programs for our youth, have been a genuine asset. At the end of the day, your “percentage” does not matter. Identity in the diaspora is a choice that you will make. Your family, friends and the infrastructure of our communities will help, but each person makes that decision at some point in their development.
It is fascinating to observe that, as a community, our entire existence is dedicated to sustaining our Armenian identity within our children, but once that connection is made there are significant transitional challenges for the emerging generation to contribute. A young adult connection to the church is the most glaring example. At face value, the senior generation is probably surprised and frustrated by this observation. Much of the elder generation includes highly dedicated lifelong servants of the Armenian nation through personal philanthropy, organizational leadership and a strong community work ethic. Perhaps therein lies part of the challenge and a possible solution. When our young adults (essentially the 25-40 age group) have difficulty participating in the community structure, it is normally attributed to two factors: they have a connection challenge with the current environment or they struggle to integrate into the infrastructure. Of course, this entire discussion assumes that the young adults have attained a level of identity where they have a desire to contribute. Today’s discussion is focused on the challenge of contributing. Building an identity will be left for other dialogue.
From a purely anecdotal perspective that is consistent with many surveys, the most popular concern in our communities is not programming or finances but the presence of our youth. The absence of young Armenians is often associated with their ambivalence towards our communal goals. We hear things such as, “The young people don’t care.” This is far from the truth. I have found our young Armenians to be engaged and committed, possessing a strong identity. Certainly there are constant challenges with establishing an Armenian identity for our youth in the diaspora, but a critical mass exists, although underutilized. Why? Two factors contributing to participation issues from the perspective of our emerging generation are either having difficulty connecting to the methods of the previous generation or struggling to integrate into the current structure. The immediate outcome of this dilemma is that they either drift into the periphery or they build their own infrastructure. Business networks and young professional organizations are examples of our new generation using the methods they are comfortable with to contribute to their communities. There are substantial numbers of young people who connect with the missions of our legacy organizations, but many groups are struggling with the generational transition. Many years ago, AGBU displayed good foresight in establishing the Young Professionals group, which allowed young Armenians in the 25-45 age group to participate under the AGBU umbrella but with their peers. The ANCA has attracted many young Armenians to the activist and advocacy domain with a grassroots structure with substantial space for practical and meaningful participation. Political activism has no age barrier, so the matriculation through the ANCA structure is an example of generational transfer. These are excellent examples, but they are in the minority. The AYF and ACYOA are popular but carry age limitations. They do a wonderful job in gathering our youth, but the adult transition is still a challenge. Significant adjustments are needed to replenish the ranks of our organizations, or they will be subordinated to diminishing transitions across generations.
There are some practical changes in our behavior that can vastly improve sustainability. Although we are all responsible for the health of our communities, the elder generations, particularly the “baby boomers,” are in a critical position. Most of us can recall one or several individuals who took the time to advise us or simply to make us feel a part of the organization or community. When these established members of our churches or organizations gave us their attention, it had a lasting impact on our motivation, interest and participation. Growing up in Indian Orchard, I can vividly recall the men and women of my parents’ and grandparents’ generation who took the time to increase my knowledge and encourage a place for me in our communities. Today, we refer to this effort as mentoring, although it didn’t necessarily have a formal name in those days. They were simply interested in encouraging the youth. One of those men in my life was the iconic Arthur Giragosian from Providence. He would often come to Indian Orchard to speak at events in our community. During these celebrations, most of the kids would play outside on the church grounds, while the adults participated in the program. I was so mesmerized by Arthur that I would leave my friends and come into the hall just to hear him speak. He was larger than life with his passionate addresses and personal connection with many in the audience. I was amazed that he was interested in talking to me. It was my earliest conversation about Hai Tahd with the community benchmark for patriotism. Over the years, as my participation increased, dear Arthur would continue to provide me insight, opinions and advice. I am absolutely certain that his commitment to the youth made a significant difference in my life for which I am eternally grateful. We all have the opportunity to mentor politically, religiously, athletically or culturally.
The role of the Armenian community mentor is twofold. First, we must connect with the youth in their environments and inspire them to become participants in community life. This requires us to think from their perspective. Volunteers in youth camps or programs are essential. Encourage the youth in ACYOA and AYF. Work with the young people in Homenetmen. The opportunities are endless if we embrace the mission. Mentoring our youth requires a sustained effort to encourage and open paths. Networks can open new doorways for their personal, professional and community development. Our communities and organizations are the beneficiaries of a successful young generation. As we age and acquire experience and hopefully wisdom, we have a responsibility to share these gifts. Of course, it is vital to conduct that effort in a manner that addresses the needs of the recipient and not simply with a “we know everything” approach. Mentoring requires a subordination of our thinking and sensitivity to others. Compassion for the success of others is your reward.
One of the areas often overlooked in our generational transitions is the evolution of our youth into leadership. It is often thwarted by feedback that they are “too young or inexperienced.” Believing in our young generation demands that we accept their entry into positions of influence. It is hypocritical for us to encourage our young people and then to leave their entry into leadership to chance. There is no gratification in transitions we are forced into by aging and attrition. We need to make room for our youth on our boards of trustees, parish councils and organizational executives as they enter their professional lives. This may require some of us to move over and make room. If being on a board or executive for 20 years is preventing a qualified and committed young person from joining, it is time to reevaluate. There are many ways for older and experienced individuals to contribute. Creating opportunities for our young people is one meaningful way. We often hear that our leadership groups are aging, and there is concern about the age mix. It is a valid concern that will not improve unless there is a conscious effort. We also hear, “Well, there aren’t any young people.” If that is the case, then we have failed. Creating something that is not sustainable is disappointing. The root cause must be examined. Is it the mission? Are we nurturing our youth? Are our methods appealing? We must always keep in mind our ability to transition to the next generation. Some organizations will not pass the litmus test. Other new groups will evolve. There are many mainstream groups that will struggle only if they don’t choose to invest in the new generations. A sustained community requires strategic outreach. It starts by taking the time to encourage those wide-eyed kids who are looking for attention and an opportunity to grow. Find your replacement and let succession become the path for sustainability.